Don't Tell Your Man This

This week on My Fat Pocket, I've written about the secrets you should keep to yourself when it comes to relationships. Do you agree that some things should be secrets??

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When you meet a potential Mr Right (and as luck would have it, he’s interested in you too) it can be easy to think you should tell him everything in preparation for your perfect life together.

But there are some things which will spoil it for him and leave you wondering what the hell happened. So here are ten things you should never tell your man:

1. You Cheated In The Past

Even if you’ve turned over a new leaf and will never cheat on him, do not tell him that you’ve cheated on any previous boyfriends. This will not only speak poorly about your character but it will also scare him. After all, most relationships start out as happy ones; if you ended up cheating on your exes then what will stop you from cheating on him?

2. Your Best Friend Is Cheating

Sometimes we girls like to make ourselves look better in the eyes of our man by revealing how bad our girlfriends are. But this often backfires because men won’t see that Halo you’re trying to create over your own head… but they will see you and your cheating best friends as birds of a feather.

3. You Don’t Like His Penis

You should never tell your man that his penis is small, thin or *gasp* deformed. He’s obviously is stuck with it. So how will telling him change anything?! Your man IS his penis. If you don’t like his penis, you’re basically saying you don’t like him.

4. You Don’t Like A Body Part Of Yours
Men are visual creatures… but they are also easily deceived visually. If you point out your flaws, they will start noticing it.

One example is, for many months, the guy I was dating didn’t realize my eyelashes were fake! Now they were not modest lashes but the fullest set of lash extensions I could get. Ever since I pointed them out to him, he started to notice the fake lashes. So imagine what would happen if I told him I thought one nostril was smaller than the other or my thighs were thick?! Don’t break the illusion!

5. How Many People You Really Slept With

As a rule of thumb, divide the real number by three (haha). The past is the past… does it really matter how many men you have been with? No, it will not change the way you feel for him. But if you tell him a high number, he will come to the conclusion that you have lousy taste in men or that you aren’t exactly wife material. You don’t want him to think that you’ve been around the block (even if you have).

6. How He Compares To Your Exes

Men are competitive. They get curious about how they compare to the men that were with you before them. If he wants to know if he is a better than your ex, this is dangerous territory to enter. Even if he tells you that he isn’t going to get angry, as soon as you start talking about your ex that jealous side of him will come out. Avoid this topic if you can but definitely don’t ever tell him that you’ve been with someone bigger or better.

7. He Reminds You Of Your Father

Although you might feel like this is a compliment, it actually freaks men out. If you’re in a sexual relationship, telling him that he reminds you of your dad is a turn off. It’s just strange to think that you would want to be in a romantic relationship with someone like your father. Yuck.

8. What You Do In The Bathroom

Women don’t smell bad or burp or fart or shit. When we sit on the toilet, we pee rainbows. Men do not want to think about their beautiful women on the toilet. Period.

9.Do You Think She’s Pretty?

Of course they do! Their standards are much lower than ours! So if you ask them this question, there’s never a right answer. If he says she’s pretty, you’ll be upset. If he says she’s not, you’ll think he’s a liar. When an attractive woman walks by, it's best to just pretend nothing happened.

10. Did You Sleep With Her?

As long as she’s not sleeping with him now, who cares? The past is gone. Don't torture yourself (and him) by harping on the past. In most cases, ignorance really is bliss.